Last night I wasn’t feeling well at all. This morning there were signs of trouble, regarding baby and crohns. James took me to the emergency room. I was sure I was miscarrying. After a few hours, lots of labs, and three ultrasounds, we had some information. I was having, as we thought, a major Crohns […]
It is amazing how in one instant everything can feel like it changed. Just days ago I was planning how I would manage to dress properly for canoing when my wet suit doesn’t fit any longer. I had written a list of projects we needed to accomplish to prepare for biking, canoing, camping and hiking […]
We all have struggles. I have struggled my whole life with many things. I have never been able to grasp that not all people can be helped because not all people want to be helped. I have struggled with the fear that anyone I upset will beat me up. I have struggled with the mental […]
We’ve been working our tails off since Saturday on the camper (no kidding – I’m seriously losing weight!) and it’s really working out for us. The screens were all pretty torn up and we replaced all of them (except the door), we tightened some screws, fixed some cabinet latches, washed some curtains – though some […]
Things haven’t been particularly easy this past year. Between two miscarriages and new jobs for both of us, James’ college education and our combined health problems, it’s been a bit overwhelming. We’re still living with family, and while it has its perks, it’d be super to have some space of our own. And that is […]
Typically, when a crisis strikes, I am able to stay calm, help to find a solution, ensure that everyone is ok and help everyone make it through, make sure that the mess following is straightened out, and then I go home. Our recent loss was similar. After the initial shock and disbelief, I was angry […]
Emotionally, I think I am doing quite well handling our loss. I feel like I was open enough with James throughout the pregnancy that I was not alone in understanding the weight of the change and the loss we experienced. His tremendous support and understanding have made the emotional burden bearable. I feel emotionally ready […]
The alarm went off at 6:45 this morning, signaling that it was time for me to get ready to go. I slowly sat up in bed, urging James to awaken, feeling overwhelmed and under-prepared for the morning ahead of me. We readied ourselves and drove to the Emergency Room. The guy that checked me in […]
I have just returned home and settled down enough to update. The sonogram showed an empty sac. The doctor is pretty positive that I am miscarrying. Since nothing is showing up, including a heartbeat, it would appear that the baby has already been re-absorbed (great mental image huh) and this has been in the works […]